Away To Me

Still boring around here.

Things are quiet during this 2WW. I did pee on the stick today but it was negative, which I figured it would be so I'm so not worried about things. Well, I always worry but not because of the pee stick. In fact today I think I felt the first sign of a possible pregnancy. I'm exhausted. Absolutely exhausted from the time I woke up this morning, till the time I took a 2 hour nap this morning. I caught a second wind after lunch but now at 5pm I think I could take a second nap. I can't quit yawning.

The pills and shot are making me sweat like crazy. More so the past few days than when I first started the PIO so it must be the estrogen. Who knows. I feel great though. Does anyone know if greasy scalp is a sign? I swear I just washed my hair and it looks all greasy again. I'm going to try to hold off testing until Thursday. I'd like to wait till after the weekend, but I don't know if I can hold off that long.

I'm afraid that if it is a negative I'll be bummed and depressed all weekend long, so I should wait and test after the holiday weekend. Then again, if it is positive, I can celebrate even more the holiday weekend. I'll figure it out by Thursday I'm sure.

Cleaning is not good for my sanity

Today I cleaned my bathroom. I cleaned out all the old shampoos, makeup, hair clips, etc. Stuff in the cute little boxes that you think you will use but you don't. I threw away an entire kitchen size trash bag worth of stuff. At one point I freaked cause I saw a box of pee sticks. But it wasn't pee sticks, it was OPK sticks. They have to be 3 years old. So I tossed them feeling relieved that I had avoided a pee stick. I had decided before we went in for ER that I would not buy any pee sticks or keep any in the house because I would be tempted to test too early. 

Not two seconds after I felt relief at seeing the OPK's and thinking, "Phew no pee sticks" guess what ... Yep, I came across a pee stick. I tried to throw it away but it kept crawling out of the trash can and saying, "pee on me, pee on me". (how much do you want to bet that some perv is going to find my blog on google cause he types a search for "pee on me".

Anyway, now the stupid pee stick sits in the bathroom drawer. I will probably pee on it tomorrow morning. I figure if it is a BFN it is fine cause it is waaaay too early to test. If it is a BFP than I get to celebrate about 5 days earlier than I expected. I'll wait and see what the morning holds. Tomorrow will be 6dp5dt. Do these things expire? I guess that gives me another excuse if it shows up BFN.

Other than the pee stick issue I'm fine. I'm tired but can't sleep which is a horrid combination. I'm hoping tonight I'll sleep better. Hubby should be in at about 1am from his East coast trip. I can't wait to snuggle up to him. 

Ovulation on video

I don't see anything leaving the ovary but the video is cool!

Mmmm Pizza!

So far my the pictures of our blasts have been described as Antique Coins (love that) Smashed bottle caps (don't love that so much - figures it would be my mother who would say that.)

But the classic came tonight. Jake was sitting in my lap and I was checking a message board where I have a pic of the blasts on my signature line. Jake points to the picture and says, "mmm pizza". They actually do look a little like pizzas.

The 2ww is just boring

I have no interesting updates, no doctor's appointments to coordinate, no follicle counting, blood test results to worry about. Nothing. Zip. Nadda!

It is too early in the wait to test or stress over symptoms or any of that neurotic behavior. I'm just boring now. I feel fine, in fact I feel great. My ovaries must be shrinking cause my belly is starting to flatten out a bit. Which is both good and disappointing. That pregnant kind of bloat feeling that stimming gave me was oddly a comforting sight. 

Hubby is out of town till basically midnight Monday. So it is just the boy and I. We went swimming yesterday. He wasn't overly cooperative. In the pool one second, out the next, wanting someone's shoes, chips, water, etc. Diverting him is not possible without physically picking him up and hiking 100 yards away. I was wiped out within an hour. We came home and he ate a ton of food and slept 3 hours and 45 mins. I think we are going through a serious growth spurt around here. He had a big appetite all day yesterday and it has started in again today. 

Here's a few pics of Jake yesterday. Quickie snap shots of busy kid in bright sunlight. Not a good combo! I love this one, he is wearing my old Angel's ball cap  and putting on his sunscreen. He has a nice color going on. 

I'd like to go down to the beach to my dad's place, but he and I got in a serious fight on the phone a few days ago. I'm waiting for an apology. He called my cell phone yesterday, I missed the call and he didn't leave a message. He called back about ten minutes later and I let it go to voice  mail hoping he'd leave a message so I could hear his tone of voice or see if he was going to apologize. No such luck, no message. So now I'm sitting here trying to figure out how to deal with it. He's a great dad, but he screwed up big time the other day. I deserve an apology. 

That's all the news from me! Have a happy summer weekend.

Goose Bump Moment

Many of my long time blog readers will remember the story about my lovingly crazy friend MJ who is very spiritual and she's into astrology and tarot cards, etc. I told her via email last week about our IVF stuff. She was really excited and reminded me that exactly 3 years ago this coming weekend was the day she told us that we would get our blond hair blue-eyed baby boy and it would probably be in either Oct or April, but she really thought it would probably be April. Well she was totally right. And it turns out that the weekend she told us that was more than likely the same weekend that Jake was conceived.

Anyway, recently I updated her about our IVF stuff. She pulled a tarot card last week and read it as positive. Then she pulled the same card today. Sort of fun and amazing. She also looked an her numerology charts and stuff and told us everything seemed to point towards "Family".

Now I'm not a wacko, I enjoy a certain amount of this stuff but I don't take it that seriously. Although she was so bang on about our son that it is sort of hard to not believe a little right? And she was honest the one month I thought I was pregnant (prior to our adoption stuff) she basically was kind when she told me that she's not seeing it. But she worded it much more tactfully. Anyway I guess my point is she's been 100% on her "predictions" or whatever you call them. But all of this is just fun stuff and taken with a grain of salt. 

But today what freaked me out is she described the photo of our embryos as looking like "Antique Coins". The reason this gave me a jolt, goose bumps and tears in my eyes, is because of a necklace I put on the morning of ET. My grandfather last month, gave me a bunch of my grandmother's jewelry. I have worn only two pieces, a ring and the necklace. I normally where platinum or white gold or silver. But this yellow gold necklace is beautiful and it reminds me so much of my grandma, she wore it ALL the time. The charm on the necklace is an antique coin! I specifically put this necklace on the morning of ET for a little grandma type support. To have someone tell me my embryos look like an antique coin, just sort of freaked me. I mean of all the descriptions somebody would expect, that's not one of them is it?

Or it could just be the progesterone giving me chills. Or the estrace pills, or the light duty/ bed rest time or the start of the 2 WW driving me crazy. 

I'm still beyond happy

I'm living in the moment right now. Seriously I am in my own reality right now. I'm considering myself pregnant and blissfully so. I figure I may only have two weeks to feel this way, so I'm going to do it right. Hopefully I have 9 long months to do it! Last night my PIO shot went MUCH, MUCH better. My nurse gave me shorter needles and a new location to shoot up! It worked, I'm so not sore and it was so much easier to do the shot. FYI the location is just below the hip bone and forward a bit. Last night to psych myself up for the shot (not knowing it would be this easy) I stared at the pics of my embryos. I'm in love. Seriously, I'm completely in love.

And for the record all the comments from you guys yesterday knocked me down! And I love, love, love the compliments about how perfect they are. LOL! Funny how the comments about the embryos feels as special to me as the comments about Jake. Feel free to tell me again. LOL Just kidding!

Speaking of Jake, he is in seventh heaven right now. He has two teenage girls at his beckon call. They are adorable young ladies and they are spoiling him to the point of no return. I don't know if I'll be able to deal with him when they go home today at 4pm. He's not going to be happy with rules again. 

Speaking of teens and babies. I watched a disgusting show last night that I swore to myself I would not watch, but I had to. I had to see how bad it was. B.aby B.orrowers. OMG! If I could have crawled through the TV screen and slapped half of the participants I would have. If I could have gotten my hands on the one girl I would have choked her. And for the boyfriend of the pouty little bitchy girl, Kelly, RUN! I think his name is Austin. He's a good kid, why is he wasting his time with a selfish, self centered, idiotic, immature little twit like her. UGH! If he was my son I'd have to take him on a looooong trip somewhere till she found someone else. 

What disturbed me more than the dumb teens is the STUPID parents. I mean we expect teens to be dumb and immature. Their brains aren't developed. What is the excuse of these parents? Seriously? There is NO WAY that I would turn my kid over for this TV show. I don't care if their were shrinks, nannies, police and armed guards watching every moment. These are dumb teens who were unkind to these babies at some points. I was disgusted. I couldn't handle it. I mean I have two adorable teen girls doting on my son right at this moment while I'm on my post ET resting period, and I I'm not willing to leave the house or even shut my door. And I know these girls and trust them. But if I have to make a run to the market today, we are all going. There is no way I'm leaving Jake. Sorry, but girls this age get to texting their friends and that's when kids like Jake climb walls. You do remember this video don't you? And by the way as I type this I hear the sweet giggles of my baby boy playing hide-n-seek with the girls. 

Transfer Update!

Okay I'll start with the picture! (click on it to make it bigger)

The embryo on the left is graded as a 5AA (5 because it is hatching). The embryo on the right is a 4AA, almost ready to hatch. If you look closely at the embryo on the left at about 2-O-Clock you can see where it has hatched out.

The transfer went great! No cramps, no issues. The full bladder was yucky, but nothing I couldn't handle. The procedure was super quick. I joked with the doc and told him to "knock me up now". And he said, "I don't think I've ever had anyone tell me that before". 

This morning when we were getting ready to leave I was grabbing a pair of socks. I teased hubby, "should I wear pink socks in case we want a girl" and he replied "how about one sock" (he is a tad bit nervous about the possibility of twins).

So there you have it. That's the update. There was one thing that irked me that I don't even feel like discussing yet. I'll blog about later. 

I hit a blood vessel tonight

For the record I HATE these PIO shots. HATE HATE HATE. I will love them if they work. I will love them when I have a healthy pregnancy but right now, tonight I hate them.

For some reason it took me 3 stabs before I got the needle in. Then I could barely pull the plunger back because I can't reach around with my opposite arm across my big ass boobies. I didn't notice blood, because I didn't pull it back far enough and I can't see in the mirror well enough. So when I got done injecting the PIO and pulled the needle out, blood came streaming out. STREAMING and rolled down my fat ass and my leg. 

I'm pissed. I really hate this part. 

Done with my vent. 

Embryo Transfer Appointment

No news is good news from the embryologist, which means we are all set for an 8am embryo transfer. Lining things up takes me back to my special event coordinator days. Geeze it was a lot of work. First I had to line up the sitter to come to our home by 6:30 am. Then I have to have two girls (sisters)  ages 11 & 13 come over later in the morning to help with Jake. They are my friend's nieces and they are super nice girls and should be a great help with Jake since hubby will be gone and I'll be on bedrest. Then I had to get someone to pick me up from the doctor's office since I can't drive myself. 

But the good news is, my ride going to the doc ... is my husband! The appointment is at 8am and his flight doesn't leave till 12:30 so he can be with me during Embryo Transfer and then leave straight from there to go to the airport which is about 45 mins away from the doc's office. I can not explain to you how excited I am hubby gets to be there. I mean when you love your husband don't you want him to be with you when you get knocked up.

Well, that's the latest and greats. The PIO shots are about the same, pain in the butt. But I'm getting better about them. The key for me is watching in the mirror. It helps me to make sure they go in straight. Anyone else get sort of crampy feeling while on the PIO shots. I've had almost constant mild cramping since starting them. 

I'll update after ET as soon as I can. I'll be on Valium but that stuff has never worked on me much before so I should be sharp enough to blog! 

Wish us luck!