Away To Me

My Jakey is back!

For the past 6-8 months my Jake has been gone. In his place has been a moody, angry, defiant, sour, mean, pill of a child, with only brief moments of sweet Jake. I haven't posted much about it because it was really bothering me and it felt like I was doing something wrong and I just didn't need blog criticism about it. I can't stress enough how awful he's been. I was embarrassed to take him to friend's places. His attitude was just horrid. He acted mad all the time.  

In my heart of hearts I hoped it was a phase. I needed it to be a phase. I felt sick when I'd think about the change in him. Obviously we knew the babies were the main cause and then the move and all the other changes he'd been through in the past 8 months. But it seemed like such a long phase I was really worried and second guessing my parenting skills, my decision making, my .... well everything.

Like a light switch something has changed. It has not been gradual. Over night he changed. I'm not kidding. It's like he woke up a completely different person (his old sweet self). He is doing things the first time he's asked, he's being nice to his brothers, he's helpful, fun, happier! He's his old self! Over freaking night he changed! It's been 5 days of this. Five days of heaven! My life is so much easier, happier! I have energy left over at night. Before he was exhausting me. I couldn't wait for daddy to get home and "take over". It's sad how much he drained me with the constant battles!

I have some fears that still cross my mind about why the sudden switch off of the poor behaviors. But I'm not going to focus on that right now ... I'm having too much fun with my Jakey back!

It's called parenting

Today I had a lesson in parenting. Lately I've had a lot of lessons in parenting, but today's lesson just proved to me how important it is to "Parent" our children. I can not tolerate the lack of parenting in this country. Makes me ill! I also can not tolerate wasting food or wasting my time.

This morning Jake didn't want the normal breakfast options he has. So, being that it was Friday and we didn't have to rush off to school. I figured I'd make him just about anything he wanted. He said he wanted a grilled cheese sandwich. Easy enough! So I made him a fancy grilled cheese sandwich. (Basic sandwich but made in the sandwich presser thing that make it look fancy). Normally this is a hit. But after two bites this morning he decided he didn't' want it.

No problem, you can eat it later I said. Tears instantly. "But I don't like it, I don't want it". Truth be told he was mad that we told him he couldn't eat in the living room. Why this request was made by him is beyond me. We don't eat in the living room.  By 10:00 he was hungry. I told him he could eat the sandwich. More tears, more screaming, more drama. I ignored it and was doing laundry at the back of the house. I came back into the kitchen and didn't notice anything out of place. Jake was watching TV in the living room, seemed to be calmed down. Then he said, "I didn't do nothing". He he little stinker still doesn't know how to play it cool. I looked, his sandwich is gone. I asked him if he ate it. Nope, he put it in the trash and told me he put it in the trash.

I calmly told him to go get it out of the trash. That we do not throw away food. He screamed, yelled, told me no. I turned off the TV, walked him to the trash can, opened the lid and because it was a brand new trash bag and nothing in there but his sandwich, I had to pull the bag up to the top of the can. (it's an extra tall trash can, he'd never be able to reach the bottom). More tears, more screaming, but the sandwich was back on the table. I sent him to his room, told him he could come out when he was able to be nice, not cry and eat his sandwich. Many tears, screaming, an occasional thrown toy and finally about 25 minutes later he came out. Proclaimed, "I'm ready to eat my sandwich now mommy". He was smiling, happy and joking as he climbed into his seat. I asked, "how's the sandwich big guy". He said, "It's nummy, thanks mommy". I was floored. As i'm typing this, he's finishing up his "nummy" sandwich, and he's telling me he loves me. He's happy as can be. I hate when he cries and tantrums and things turn into such a wreck. It makes me rehash all that I did to see if I could have handled it better. Seeing his attitude change and watching him happily eat his sandwich just made my morning. I know he learned a good lesson. All those tears, both his and mine, were not cried for nothing!

Big giant sigh .... the sad worried kind.

I received an email from Jake's bio dad yesterday. It wasn't the warm fuzzy kind I was hoping for. It had sad news in it. It breaks my heart. I obviously won't go into details, but the news effects my son. I don't know how to respond to the email. I don't know how to journal this information fo Jake later in life. I suppose I could just keep a copy of the email for him. That way it's not my take on things, it's the truth as told by his bio dad.

Makes my heart ache though.

Perfect PJ day!

Last night the boss came over for dinner. Good thing he is a kid person! I made a pretty good chicken/pasta white wine butter sauce thing. I like the boss. I'm worried about some of the decisions he makes, but hey, it's his business and he's the boss. But I do enjoy his company and he enjoys are children.

This morning however, I woke up to more rain (Yeah we need it) But also a pile of dishes and a pounding headache. And so, the babies and I will remain in PJs all day. While Jake may end up doing more of this:

That no work

Jake took a monster header off the couch onto the coffee table today. Ten minutes later he'd tossed the ice I gave him and was fine. He limps into the kitchen and says, "I going to fly mommy". I said, "Well let me know if you sprout some wings". Dumb, dumb mommy thing to say.

Five minutes later I hear a crash, bang - splat followed by, "that no work".

Twas the Night Before Christmas

Jake's literary choices for this evening ... Twas The Night before Christmas and Walter the Farting Dog.

 

The stockings are hung. The cookies & brownie are set out for Santa. The milk is poured for him and in the fridge. The Reindeer food is out on the front porch. The babies are sleeping and Jake is fighting off sleep, excited that Santa will be here tonight!

 

Merry Christmas from our family to you and yours. May all your Christmas wishes come true.

Seriously - Bah Humbug doesn't mean I'm depressed

Geeze people, relax. I'm not depressed. I'm tired, I was sick and I've got a lot on my plate, but I'm fine. No wonder I've not been blogging very much. LOL!

For the record. I got 90% of the presents wrapped tonight. We do have  a tree and it is beautifully decorated. Although we are keeping it on the front porch so the babies don't destroy it. I also have multi-colored lights and garland on the mantle and Christmas decor in the kitchen and bathroom. Oh and a wreath on the front door. So there!

Christmas cards got finished today. The photos on them suck, but hey, I got 3 kids and one out of 3 dogs in the picture and they don't have any stains on their shirts and nobody is crying. I call that success.

I made stock today for the Gumbo we are going to have on Christmas day. It should be yummy and I suspect this may turn out to be a new tradition for us. The house smells so good today just from making the stock. Jake walked inside and said, "smells good mom. You did a good job. Good job mom, I'm proud of you". Then he waves to me and heads back outside. I about wet my pants I laughed so hard. I tell you this kid is either making me cry from laughing or cry from biting my tongue and pulling my hair out!

Here's a pic of Jake the first time he met Santa. We went to the zoo on Saturday night and he was there. It was the first time Jake ever met Santa. Such a fine time!

And of course the babies had to meet him. Nathan ... not a fan yet. Wesley was just trying to figure out why Nathan was upset.

My kid swims and my dog dunks!

Jake is officially a swimmer. It makes me relax just a tad. If he should ever fall in a pool, I know he's safe to make it to the side. But gosh I hope he never has access to the pool without us! 

Children's Museum

We took Jake to the Children's Museum. It was a blast! In fact, it was so much fun we bought an annual membership. The sucky thing is I can't take the stroller into the main gallery part of the museum. But, I'm strong, I can leave the stroller near the entrance and I can set the carriers down at each station and play with Jake. I'm going to make it work.

My cousin, my aunt and my cousin's son are coming to visit me on Wednesday. I can't wait! Her son is 5 years old and he and Jake should have a blast at the Children's Museum. And bonus, with our 3 annual passes that we bought yesterday, (one for me, one for daddy and one for Jake) we got 3 free passes. So my family can go for free! 

Jake was such a good boy there yesterday. He enjoyed each area of play. They have a young chef's program that I'm going to take him to starting at the end of the month. If I can find a sitter, I'm going to leave the twins with a sitter while I take Jake, just mommy and Jake time. He needs that, even though he is so amazing with his big brothers. 

Here are a few pics. The last one is of Nathan wearing his One Fish, Two Fish shirt that Susan sent the boys. We packed up most of our books, but at the Museum yesterday we happened across the book. Such a coincidence that I had to take a pic. Wesley was wearing Horton Hears a Who shirt, but I couldn't get a good pic of him. 

Girlfriends and Poop

Oh my this is lol funny!